1. “Hey, I love your shoes (or handbag, or coat, etc.)!” Who doesn’t love being complimented?! This is an easy, non-awkward way to start conversation and get brownie points at the same time. 

2. “Hi, I would love to get you a drink.” Perfect for when you spot someone in a bar setting. It’s simple and direct. Try not to sound cheesy…it’s pretty easy with this one. And PLEASE, take “no” for an answer. Persistence is not the key here, it just weirds people out and makes everyone uncomfortable.

3. “What kind of dog is that?” Everyone loves talking about their little pal. It shows you’re interested and instantly gives you something to talk about. As e-Harmony says, if you’re feeling brave/witty, add “Does he/she have a phone number?”

4. “Are you single?” I agree, this sounds scary and forward. But after working for a matchmaker, and actually USING this line in real life, I can assure you it’s not as awkward as you might think. If you ask with your most charming smile and maybe even with a little laugh (like you know this is very direct, but you’re going for it!) then if the answer is “no,” most people will be impressed with your straightforward approach.

5.” Hi, who’s your friend?” According to the article, you can try this one if you’re “a big more daring and playful.” Personally, I disagree with this line. I’d be either offended, or creeped out.

6. “Nice to meet you, I’m ____ and you’re beautiful!” With a lot of people, flattery will get you everywhere. This approach is again, very direct, but could also brighten someone’s day and your chances of grabbing a date. 

7.  ”I bet you were an awfully cute baby.” Ok, another one I don’t necessarily agree with. I promise, most of the ones on this list are good! However, although the article says this should come across as “endearing without being offensive,” I’d stay away from using this line. To me, it seems more like they’re a little too focused on babies (take that however you will…)!

8. “How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice!” This classic, marginally cheesy pickup line is actually pretty sweet and funny. Who doesn’t enjoy a joke? This can show you don’t take yourself TOO seriously, which in the dating world is definitely a plus.

9. “Excuse me, but you have something on your face,” (when she goes to wipe it off stop her and say) “No, no leave it. It’s beauty.” Ok, this actually made me laugh out loud. Yes, it’s super cheesy, but if a cutie came up to me and said this, I don’t think I could resist. Actually, I might start using this. Watch out, boys!

10. “WHO are you?”The article says this is another “simple and endearing approach.” I on the other hand, don’t get it at all. I would think that this person knew me, or recognized me, if they asked me a question like that. Maybe I’m not quite getting the tone here, and if the right person asked in the right way it’d seem cute, but…I’ll stick with polar bears and beauty on your face.

Basically, most of these fun and direct pickup lines are a great way to start the conversation and involve that person you’ve been eyeing. And don’t forget, although Valentine’s Day is coming up, February 15th is the best day to start dating people! Why? You have an entire year before the pressure of another V-Day comes up (ha-ha)! Anyways, if you don’t get out there, you won’t get un-single. So muster up that courage and hit on some hotties!

Anyway, I wanted to share what I’ve learned from Janet Page in about 5 minutes: I’m committing a few of her “Dating Sins.”

To quote the great Janet Page:

“#1 Terminal Cuteness and #2 Chattering” are the biggest dating sins I commit. It’s hard for me to not come across as that cute little teen (even though I’m 22!) that has a crush on you, and to not stop rambling about random things I think you might be interested in. I mean let’s be real, I don’t really know what topics you’re truly interested in, or if you want a cute girl next door…or a hot babe!

But, have no fear, single ladies ! She also lists some turn-ons for men. Ten, as a matter of fact, to make up for the ten sins she discusses.

Men like certain behaviors; it’s not about physical qualities, but more about what you do and how you do it.

“Physical affection, a sense of humor, intelligence, commitment to a career (or other interest), well-cared-for body, generosity, ability to listen (when you don’t tell him what to do), honesty, common values, low drama.”

As Dr. Page says, “Men are not looking for perfect bodies and people pleasers.” Good news! You can be yourself to find your perfect match. And if you’re not yourself, and you find a match, guess what?! It’s not “The One.” It’s someone who your alter-ego thinks is the one.

I will try and stop being terminally cute and chattering… that sounds like the kid you don’t want to babysit. I will make more attempts at showing off my sense of humor and my great listening skills. Let’s show people what we’re really about, and find whoever loves us for who we are.

Dr. Jane Page, a renowned psychotherapist and love expert, provides a comprehensive guide to finding love in her book “Get Married This Year.”  The book discusses how to knock down roadblocks that hinder your love life, as well as the simple rules of dating to help achieve the ultimate goal: a loving marriage.  In her discussion at the Buckhead Theater, she will engage participants and enlighten them on how to find the one you want to marry, within a year’s time, and how to be honest with yourself about choosing that person. Her empowering attitude encourages women to realistically seek what they are looking for in life. At this event, as she says in her book, you’ll get some “fear-busting, dating skill building, and communication training” to help you find the one…and “Get Married This Year!”

You’re browsing through people, and the scanning and picking is fun, like you’re online shopping. However, you’re shopping for a date; checking out their array of photos, interests, job, and education, everything to find that “perfect” person. You find that person, and superficially they sound like a great match. Sure, he’s cute…I guess I could enjoy playing squash and rock collecting; I mean he’s a doctor, you think. Once you arrive at the date, the first thing you think of is how impressed you are with the technology improvements of Photoshop. But, who’s going to be rude and leave? It’s too late to “return your purchase!” You give it a chance, but conversation is dull, and you’re stuck. It’s just the two of you, alone together for the most awkward next few hours of your life. And how do you really know who this stranger is?

With online dating, the lack of an outside source to help allows you to sway your own likes and interests just to go out with someone that you think is The One. Although you do have your own profile, you basically act as your own matchmaker, and that can be a sticky situation. Who knows who you are actually going to meet, and if you’ll enjoy their company? Who knows if you’re even going to be safe?

Group dinner and dating services are your safety net compared to the scary free-fall of online dating. With someone other than yourself there to match you up with compatible, yet diverse people, you have more of a chance to meet a new date, or even just an awesome new friend. An objective source helps to weed out the people who wouldn’t be right for you, as a friend or as a date. And if you don’t like the person, you’re not stuck with just them for the rest of the night. Seven other possible friends and dates are there to mingle with, taking the pressure off and relieving the tension, as well as providing a safe, yet fun environment. Sounds like the perfect first date…a group of seven others, on similar professional and educational levels as you, matched up just right to complement each other and provide good conversation.

On those rare occasions, online dating does work, but that’s by chance, and online dating is pretty much just that: a game of chance. You never truly know who you’re going to end up with, alone, and that can be scary as well as frustrating. Group dinners are a safer, more relaxed way to branch out and can much more effectively find those who you connect with, using an unbiased outside source. So give up on the “online shopping”, since the products are questionable, and go for the fun, safe, exciting new experience of group dinners.

Call me old-fashion, but I hope some of these trends disappear just as fast as the New Year is approaching us. Whether you think dating is a game or a battlefield, it is important to know the rules. So, I hope you enjoy these quirky facts and tidbits as much as I do. Just promise not to use them to strike-up conversation with that hottie by the punch bowl.

Happy Dating!

Eight at Eight
Urban professionals accepted to this exclusive 11-year-old service (8at8.com) can purchase a package of five dinner parties ($700), where straight singles are carefully matched in groups of eight at a restaurant (four men and four women, with new ones each time). The fee only covers only a drink, but once a hostess makes introductions, dinners usually produce at least one couple. Members range in age from 23 to 55, but, says founder Sarah Kathryn Smith, “Our sweet spot is helping people in their thirties and forties.”

Since celebrities love free stuff, we thought we’d offer a sort-of-condolence gift: advice. Sorry Kris, but Kim’s the bigger celebrity and harder to match. (Anyway, we bet you’ll just settle down with a sweet and pretty girl from your home state… wherever that was again. Did we mention that she’ll probably be blonde?)

But who should Kim date next? She’s a powerful businesswoman and loves being in the spotlight. Kim needs a partner who can support her high-profile lifestyle. Here are our suggestions:

Guy Richie- He’s mature, artistic, successful, and could handle dating Madonna.

Ryan Reynolds- He’s funny, attractive, and has three older brothers (which would make great TV). He’s been married before so he’s been through a similar experience, and he’s not afraid of commitment.

Tyler Perry- He’s an entrepreneur like Kim and very well connected. He’s family oriented and seems like he’s ready to settle down.

Prince Amedeo- He’s a member of the Belgian royal family and lives in New York City where he works for Deloitte. Kim would not only be connected across the country, but also cross the Atlantic. He’s very athletic and has even run the NYC Marathon.

We hope Kim will take our advice when she’s ready to date again.